Day 18: Starting Off Winning

Woke up about 3:00am feeling like a cold was coming on – I turned off my alarm because it’s Saturday anyway. Then went back to sleep. I wrestled a lot with sleep, finally got out of bed around 8:00am feeling like crap.

Yep full blown cold (or maybe strep – my throat has been getting more and more sore).

But I did get some deep breathing and stillness practice in (couldn’t do much else).

I have some energy, so I figured I’d keep the blog going.

Thinking about dealing with hardship like being sick, I’ve been wondering if I should have done more, or rested more.

Seeking comfort is a trap, but in this case I can’t help but think I’ll probably get better – either through the external body heat introduction through a hot shower (nice and comfy) or due to the drop in core body temp that will result, I’d be able to sleep better.

In other news, I can’t believe how much better my son is reacting to me since I realized I resented him. Kids really can pick up on a lot more than we give them credit for. I feel like a jackass (for a lot of reasons), but with regard to my son, I just hope I got it cleared up before he really starts to develop his own shadow.

Meh, it’ll probably happen anyway, but at least I can help him find it and make peace with it.

There are instances where anger is righteous, but I’m starting to think that the anger most people feel towards others is a result of seeing something of themselves in the other person that they don’t like.

I’ve had a couple of eye opening moments where I let myself experience my anger and analyze where it was coming from, only to realize that yeah it’s something I wish I would change about myself and so I get made at someone else who displays the same behavior.


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